


April Fools Specials

by snowflakeimagines



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: April Fools, April Fools' Day, Best Friends, Candy, Detachable Head, Flowers, Gender-neutral Reader, Multi, One Shot Collection, Pranks, cling wrap, pollen allergy, prank call, prank gone wrong
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-26
Updated: 2019-04-27
Packaged: 2020-01-06 02:20:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 23
Words: 10,064
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18378950
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/snowflakeimagines/pseuds/snowflakeimagines
Summary: A collection of stories I wrote to celebrate 300 followers on Tumblr.





	1. Table of contents

**April Fools Special #1: The Suffering:**  (🔫) The reader pranks UT Sans by pretending to drink a bottle of windex/window cleaner (it’s just blue Gatorade). (Prompt sent by [@ajaejay-san](https://tmblr.co/mcx98ssCmv-LqDc9qZvpAwg))

**—**

**April Fools Special #2: The Ritual** **:** (🔫) The reader pranks UF Sans by pretending to drink a bottle of windex/window cleaner (it’s just blue Gatorade). Papyrus is in on the joke! (Prompt sent by [@ajaejay-san](https://tmblr.co/mcx98ssCmv-LqDc9qZvpAwg)) 

**—**

**April Fools Special #3: The Challenge:** (🍊) The reader gives UF Papyrus orange juice that’s really just cheese and water. (Prompt sent by [@this-is-rae](https://tmblr.co/mGEHwDc6nYNX6iMP93rmONw))

**—**

**April Fools Special #4: The Plan** **:** (📞) UT Sans prank calls Papyrus. (Prompt sent by [@mavi-mav](https://mavi-mav.tumblr.com)) 

**—**

**April Fools Special #5: The Brat:** (🔫) 9-year-old UF Papyrus pranks 12-year-old Sans by pretending to drink a bottle of windex/window cleaner (it’s just water and blue food dye). (Prompt sent by [@mavi-mav](https://mavi-mav.tumblr.com))

**—**

**April Fools Special #6: The War:** [@anneimaginesundertale](https://anneimaginesundertale.tumblr.com)/[@annegirl13](https://tmblr.co/m-Gzydov__rdGzfnOaz3uig) donates a bowl filled with a mixture of M&Ms, Reese’s cups, and skittles to the skeletons (and a certain Agent of Chaos) in The Multiverse Room.

**—**

**April Fools Special #7: The Not-So-Sweet Surprise:**  (🍭) The reader pranks US Papyrus with candy that’s supposed to be sweet, but is actually very sour. (Prompt sent by [@queen-lethargy](https://tmblr.co/mkC8gCEDxl7xbbMhxYuMyYQ)) 

**—**

**April Fools Special #8: The Unprankable(…?)** **:** (🥛) The reader offers UF Sans a glass of “water” that’s actually filled with vinegar. (Prompt sent by an anonymous follower) 

**—**

**April Fools Special #9: The Soap-rise:**  (🍥) US Sans pranks Papyrus with a bar of soap that looks like chocolate. (Prompt sent by [@pureangleda](https://tmblr.co/m6oHXGOCQkQQ5nY-i-SiV2Q))

**—**

**April Fools Special #10: The Yeet:** (🌺) US Sans accidentally gives the reader a bouquet of flowers they’re allergic to. (Prompt sent by [@keziha-chan](https://tmblr.co/mJWYW6Fq7EWa4Zf6VYU0ZGA))

**—**

**April Fools Special #11: The Accident:**  (🚪) The reader pranks UF Sans by covering the doorway with plastic wrap. (Prompt sent by [@keziha-chan](https://tmblr.co/mJWYW6Fq7EWa4Zf6VYU0ZGA))

**—**

**April Fools Special #12: The Unexpected** **:** (🍬) The reader offers grapes wrapped in candy wrappers to UF Papyrus. (Prompt sent by Heartstamp Anon)

**—**

**April Fools Special #13: The Distraction: (🍺)** The reader pranks US Sans by pretending to drink vodka (it’s just water).  (Prompt sent by Heartstamp Anon)

**—**

**April Fools Special #14: The Not-So-Prepared** **:** (🍮) US Papyrus replaces Sans’ vanilla pudding with mayo. (Prompt sent by Heartstamp Anon)

**—**

******April Fools Special #15: The Math Lesson:**  (🦄) 8-year-old SF Sans tries to convince 4-year-old Papyrus that there’s a new number between 5 and 6. (Prompt sent by [@hansama](https://hansama.tumblr.com)/[@han-doodles](https://han-doodles.tumblr.com))

**—**

**April Fools Special #16: The Completely Normal Day:** UT Sans and the reader prank Papyrus by sticking all the furniture in the house onto the ceiling. (Prompt sent by [@queen-lethargy](https://tmblr.co/mkC8gCEDxl7xbbMhxYuMyYQ))

**—**

**April Fools Special #17: The Overthinker:**  UF Sans and the reader tell Papyrus to prepare himself for pranks that never come, leaving him on  _edge_  for the whole day. (Prompt sent by [@quezq](https://tmblr.co/m9HrY1NceNs2by-ak8snJow))

**—**

**April Fools Special #18: The Lie** **:** (❗️) The reader blows sneezing powder in UT Sans’ face. (Prompt sent by [@this-is-rae](https://tmblr.co/mGEHwDc6nYNX6iMP93rmONw))

**—**

**April Fools Special #19: The Framed Mutt** **:** (⁉️) The reader pours itching powder on SF Papyrus’ hands and down Sans’ shirt. (Prompt sent by [@awkward-ark](https://tmblr.co/mUtHmo_Sv7g_gemQ5jTHIcA))

**—**

**April Fools Special #20: The Creepy-Crawly:** (🕷) The reader leaves a live centipede in US Sans’ bed. (Prompt sent by an anonymous follower)

**—**

**April Fools Special #21: The Oracle** **:** (🔮) The UT skelebros pretend to read the reader’s palm and give them a bad future. (Prompt sent by [@this-is-rae](https://tmblr.co/mGEHwDc6nYNX6iMP93rmONw))

**—**

**Bonus April Fools Special: The Errands:** Sans and the reader’s POV during Special #17.


	2. April Fools Special #1: The Suffering

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (🔫) The reader pranks UT Sans by pretending to drink a bottle of windex/window cleaner (it’s just blue Gatorade). (Prompt sent by @ajaejay-san)

You’d been walking non-stop around the house for the past fifteen minutes, trying to escape Sans’ bad puns. Alas, wherever you went, the punning skeleton followed. If only Papyrus was home. Maybe he could save you from this hell…

“if i’m the night guard at a samsung store, does that make me a guardian of the galaxy?”

“Ugh…”

“what do you call a hundred rabbits walking backwards? a receding hare line.”

“Nooo…”

“you’ve walked past here ten times already. was that in- **ten** -ded?”

“That might be your worst one yet…!”

“aww, shucks. you know you find my jokes  **pun** -derful.”

“Boo. Overused.”

“really? i thought it was pretty  **pun-** ny.”

“Even more overused.” You trudged into the living room. “God, kill me already…” You briefly considered throwing a pillow at him to shut him up, but it was highly likely that Sans had stuffed them all with whoopee cushions. Plus, one wrong move could set off a series of his hidden traps. You’d already fallen victim to at least six of his contraptions today. Though they were simple, they were still a pain in the ass.

“c’mon, you haven’t even heard the  **pun** -chline yet!”

“I can’t take this anymore. I need bleach or a tide pod or  _something…_ ” You spotted a bottle of window cleaner on the windowsill. Hey, didn’t you fill that thing with blue Gatorade last night? Now was your chance to use it! “Ah, here we go!” You picked up the bottle and, leaning against the wall nonchalantly, took a big swig of the liquid inside. You sighed blissfully. “I can feel it cleansing my soul already.”

Sans laughed nervously, sweat beading on his skull. “heh, um… ya sure humans can drink that stuff? i-i don’t think humans are exactly  **ammonia** to that…” His body visibly stiffened when you raised the bottle to your lips again and drank the rest of the Gatorade.

“Aww. All out.” You tossed the bottle to the side and went for the bathroom. “Do we have any more?”

Sans popped up in front of you, blocking your way. “nope. not happening.”

“Step aside. I need this.” You pushed past him and opened the cabinet containing cleaning agents. Just before you could get your hands on the nail polish, Sans grabbed you by the arm and dragged you out of the room. You whined loudly.

“i’m not lettin’ you touch any of that,” he said solemnly. He got his phone out of his pocket and unlocked it. “i’m callin’ someone. whatever you just drank cannot be good for you.”

“No!” You leapt at him and snatched his phone away. You hissed like a cat. “Mine!”

“give that back!”

“No!”

“i’m trying to help you here!”

You hissed again.

“they’ve gone insane,” he muttered, rubbing his neck. “they’ve actually gone insane. did my puns do this or is it the windex?”

Whatever the answer was, Sans didn’t have time to dwell on it. You were crawling away at top speed and he had to stop you before you sent every single one of his contacts a text saying he liked to piss his pants. Again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me and my other works on Tumblr at https://snowflakeimagines.tumblr.com!


	3. April Fools Special #2: The Ritual

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (🔫) The reader pranks UF Sans by pretending to drink a bottle of windex/window cleaner (it’s just blue Gatorade). Papyrus is in on the joke! (Prompt sent by @ajaejay-san)

“hey. hey babe. how do ya get a baby into a small box?” 

You dragged a hand down your face. “Stop.”

“with a blender,” he said anyway with a shit-eating grin. “how do ya get a baby  _out_  of a small box?”

“Sans. Enough.”

“with doritoes.”

“Ugh!” You threw your hands up and stomped into the bathroom, where Papyrus was sticking fake bugs onto the shower head. Your eyes met and he gave you the slightest of nods. He was ready. 

Sans had been tormenting both you and his brother with dark jokes and puns (they weren’t even that funny!) for the entire day. Now was your chance to get him back.

“aww, c’mon!” Your boyfriend popped into existence beside you, leaning smugly against the sink. “don’t run away! i still got a skele-ton a’ skele-puns to tell!”

“You never listen! Enough is enough, Sans.” You flung open a cabinet and took out a bottle of Windex. You unscrewed the cap.

“don’t be so— oh my god!” Sans cried as you threw your head back and chugged the contents of the bottle. The sugary, fruity taste of Gatorade Blue clung to your tongue as you set it down and coughed into your hand. “i don’t think— human’s can’t—  you’re gonna—”

Papyrus steadied you when you wobbled on your feet. “DON’T JUST STAND THERE, IDIOT!” he snapped at Sans. “THE HUMAN HAS INGESTED POISON TO ESCAPE  _YOUR_  TERRIBLE JOKES! WE MUST WORK FAST!” He hauled you to the living room. Sans followed, sweating bullets and repeating “oh god, oh god” over and over like a broken record. Papyrus laid you down on the couch. “WINK,” he whispered quietly. You smiled faintly and closed your eyes, letting your head loll to the side. “THEY’RE LOSING CONSCIOUSNESS! I’LL KEEP THEM STABLE WITH MY MAGIC!” Green magic enveloped your soul.

“’s all my fault,” you could hear Sans muttering. “i shoulda listened, oh stars—”

“STOP BLITHERING AND HELP!”

“yes! right!”

“GO TO THE KITCHEN AND GET SOME COFFEE BEANS!”

A short pause, then: “got em!”

“NOW EAT THEM!”

“i— what?”

“EAT THEM! EAT THE COFFEE BEANS!”

“how’s this s’posed to help?!”

“IT IS AN ESSENTIAL STEP IN THE RITUAL OF EXPELLING POISON FROM HUMAN BODIES!”

“where’d ya hear that?! and why don’t you have to eat em?!”

You groaned. “YOUR HUMAN’S CONDITION IS WORSENING!” Papyrus said immediately. “HURRY THE HELL UP AND EAT THE BEANS!”

Slow crunching, followed by a loud gulp. “ughhh… done…”

“GOOD! NOW, YOU MUST SWEAR TO NEVER TELL A BAD JOKE!”

“why?! i like bad jokes!” Sans almost whined.

“WE MUST GET RID OF THE ROOT OF THE PROBLEM! THIS IS THE ONLY WAY!”

“…”

“HURRY UP!”

“i-i swear!”

“SHIT! IT’S NOT ENOUGH! I THINK— YES. YOU MUST SWEAR TO NEVER MAKE A DARK JOKE AGAIN!”

“n-never? never ever? not even a slightly messed up one?”

“IF YOU DON’T DO IT NOW, YOU WILL HAVE TO SWEAR TO NEVER MAKE  **ANY KIND OF JOKE AT ALL!** ”

“i swear!”

“SAY IT ALL TOGETHER!”

“i swear to never make a dark joke ever again!”

“ALMOST DONE! GET A CUP!”

Frantic shuffling. “here!”

“GO FILL IT WITH TOILET WATER!”

“toilet water?!”

“ **DID I FUCKING STUTTER?!** ”

“n-no boss!” 

A few seconds of silence passed, interrupted only by a half-suppressed snicker from Papyrus. When Sans returned, he got back into character and shouted, “DRINK IT!”

“you want me ta  **what?!** ”

“DRINK THE TOILET WATER!”

“that’s fuckin’ nasty!”

“OH, SO YOU’D LICK ICE CREAM OFF THE PAVEMENT AND YOU WOULDN’T DRINK TOILET WATER TO SAVE THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE?!”

“are ya sure you know whatcher doin’?! i’ve seen tons a’ weird human shit but none of em ever said anythin’ about drinkin’ toilet water to get rid a’ poison!”

“DRINK IT!” Papyrus all but screeched. “ **CONSUME THE SACRED WATER!** ”

You couldn’t hold it in anymore. You burst out laughing, curling in on yourself slightly. Papyrus’ facade cracked and suddenly he was howling with laughter as well, pounding the coffee table with his fist. Sans’ cup of toilet water fell to the floor. He looked completely dumbstruck. The sight just made you laugh even harder.

“O-Ohoh my god! That was a-hah-amazing! Paps, you’re a great actor!”

“THAT’S PAYBACK FOR ALL YOUR SHITTY JOKES, SANS! HOW DOES KARMA TASTE, BITCH?!” Papyrus gloated with an almost child-like glee. “WHOOP WHOOP! GET DUNKED ON!” He held up a gloved hand towards you. “UP TOP!” 

You sat up and headbutted his hand. The two of you grinned triumphantly at Sans. “You just got pranked, son!”

“hah…” He closed his eye-sockets and shook his head slowly, fists clenching and unclenching at his sides. A dark aura settled over the room. 

“…Uh oh.”

“FUCK.”

“when i get my hands on you two…” Sans opened his eyes, revealing one red, blazing eyelight in his left socket. “ **t h e r e’ s   g o n n a   b e   h e l l   t o   p a y .** ”

“WELPGOTTAGOBYE!”

“Traitor! Wait for me!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don’t worry; Papyrus would have ended the prank there even if the reader hadn’t burst out laughing. He wouldn’t let Sans drink toilet water. Not on his watch, anyway. 
> 
> Sans would most definitely drink toilet water if it meant actually saving his S/O. He was hesitant in this scenario because he could see that the reader’s soul didn’t have anything wrong with it and he wasn’t sure how poison and humans and souls worked and if Papyrus was lying or— Well. Yeah.
> 
> (btw that joke at the beginning is from changeside’s underfell sans ukagaka go check it out)


	4. April Fools Special #3: The Challenge

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (🍊) The reader gives UF Papyrus orange juice that’s really just cheese and water. (Prompt sent by @this-is-rae)

You’d woken up early today to make “breakfast” for Papyrus. After dodging multiple buckets filled with slime and almost being swept up in a net, you had a plate of “sunny-side up eggs” on toast (half an apricot and mayonnaise) and a cup of “orange juice” (water and cheese powder). Was the trouble going to be worth it? Probably not, but it was worth a shot. 

You returned to the bedroom, being sure not to set off the tripwire at the doorway. Papyrus was already awake, inspecting his body for anything you might’ve stuck on him. “Good morning!” you said cheerfully. “I made you breakfast!”

“GOOD MORNING,” Papyrus said, taking the plate from you. You set the drink down on the bedside table. “HAVE YOU EATEN YET?”

Duh. Of course you have. You had a stash of food hidden in the house, some of which you’d eaten for breakfast or used to make Papyrus’ food. You didn’t trust anything in the fridge. “Yep!”

He stared at his plate for a few seconds longer before looking back to you with a flat expression. “YOU DIDN’T EXPECT ME TO FALL FOR THIS, DID YOU?”

You cocked your head to the side innocently. “What do you mean?”

He picked up the glass of orange juice. “WATER AND CHEESE?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Papyrus stared at you.

“Fine,” you sighed. “You got me. Damnit.”

He set the cup and plate down on the table. “THIS ISN’T ALL YOU HAD PLANNED FOR TODAY, WAS IT?” he asked, checking the floor for any traps before getting out of bed. “I WAS EXPECTING A CHALLENGE, YOU KNOW.”

“And a challenge you shall have!” you said confidently, staring him down — or rather, staring him up, considering how tall the skeleton was. “I’ll make this April Fools showdown the hardest one you’ve ever had!”

“YOU’RE UP AGAINST TOUGH COMPETITION, DEAREST. EVERY APRIL FIRST IS A NIGHTMARE WHEN YOU LIVE WITH SANS. THOSE EXPERIENCES HAVE RENDERED ME UNPRANKABLE.” He lifted his chin haughtily and stalked past you. “ I WISH YOU THE BEST OF LUCK. YOU WILL NEED IT.”

“Same to you,” you called after him.  _Just you wait,_ you thought to yourself.  _You’re not gonna be smirking like that when you find out what I did to your traps._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah... unless he's really tired or forgot the day (which is very very very unlikely), he's not gonna fall for this. 
> 
> Rae writes great Undertale imagines too! Go check them out at https://this-is-rae.tumblr.com!


	5. April Fools Special #4: The Plan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (📞) UT Sans prank calls Papyrus. (Prompt sent by @mavi-mav)

Sans stood in a phone booth, holding the phone to the side of his skull and entering Papyrus’ number into the keypad. If his brother hadn’t fallen for the pranks he’d set up at home, maybe this would get him. Papyrus had the ability to “see through the phone” — which, like most of their unique powers, was not something they questioned too much — so Sans had donned a black cloak and a pair of Groucho glasses; the best of all disguises in the world.

_Ring ring._

“HELLO, THIS IS PAPYRUS!”

“Hey. It’s me, Mark,” Sans said in Determination Mono with the thickest Brooklyn accent he could manage. “You remember me, right?”

“UH… YES! YES, OF COURSE I REMEMBER YOU!” Papyrus’ nervousness was clear as day in his voice. “WHY ARE YOU CALLING ME, MARK?”

“Y’know. The plan.”

“THE PLAN? THIS ISN’T A PRANK, IS IT? IT  _IS_ APRIL FOOLS AFTER ALL…”

“Not where I am.”

“REALLY? THE STREET YOU’RE ON RIGHT NOW LOOKS AN AWFUL LOT LIKE—”

“I wouldn’t joke about the plan. Don’t you remember what it is?”

“OH, RIGHT! THE PLAN! HEY, JUST TO BE SURE THAT  _YOU_  REMEMBER IT, CAN YOU TELL ME WHAT ‘THE PLAN’ IS?”

“C’mon, bud. I can’t say it here.”

“WHY NOT?”

“They’ll hear.”

“WHO WILL?”

“Look— d’you remember or not?”

“Y-YES!”

“Good. It’s been a long time, hasn’t it?”

“INDEED IT HAS, MY GOOD FRIEND MARK!”

“I can’t wait to start summoning demons again.”

“…”

“…”

“…WHAT?!”

“I have the sigils and sand prepared. I even got the goat blood ya asked for.”

“GOAT BLOOD?! ME?!”

“Yeah, you. Yer one brave fella, aren’tcha? Summonin’ one a’ the most dangerous demons in existence. You even wanted to do it on yer own!”

“UH…”

“Anyway, keep an eye on those haunted dolls in yer room, yeah? The spell ya cast on the chest ya locked em in only lasts for so long.”

“THANK YOU FOR THE REMINDER, MARK! I WILL BE SURE TO KEEP AN EYE ON THOSE HAUNTED DOLLS IN MY ROOM EVEN THOUGH I DO NOT I HAVE EYES! HAHAH! WELL! I MUST GO NOW! GOODBYE!”

The moment Papyrus hung up, Sans collapsed against the wall, practically dying of laughter. Passersby shot him strange looks, but he couldn’t care less about them. His phone rang in his pocket. He forced himself to stop laughing and answered it. 

Papyrus’ voice came blaring through his phone, and suddenly Sans was in stitches again. “SANSITHINKI’MSTUCKINACULTTHISISLIKETHATONEVIDEOWESAWONYOUTUBEWHEREAREDDITORISSTUCKINACULTEXCEPTTHISISWORSEBECAUSEINEVERKNEWIWASINACULTTOBEGINWITH!”

“ahahahah— oh stars, i’m cryin’!”

“APPARENTLY THERE ARE HAUNTED DOLLS IN MY ROOM?! BUT  **WHERE?!**  DID THEY ESCAPE?! OH MY GOD THEY ESCAPED DIDN’T THEY?!” Loud rustling and frantic footsteps. “DO WE HAVE ANY CROSSES IN THE HOUSE?!”

“i-i can’t breathe, oh my g-god!”

“STOP LAUGHING AND HELP ME!”

“a-april fools!”

“…HUH?”

“Get pranked!” he shouted in his ‘Mark voice’. “i can’t believe you actually fell for that!”

“…OH, YOU SON OF A— ”

Sans hung up.


	6. April Fools Special #5: The Brat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (🔫) 9-year-old UF Papyrus pranks 12-year-old Sans by pretending to drink a bottle of windex/window cleaner (it’s just water and blue food dye). (Prompt sent by @mavi-mav)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I headcanon the skelebros to be the exact same age (it’s either that or Sans is older by a few seconds), but in this fic Sans is 12 years old and Papyrus is 9 years old. The Gaster I write is similar to the one from the Handplates AU, but here he’s an incompetent workaholic dad.

“YOU ALWAYS TAKE IT TOO FAR!” an exasperated Papyrus yelled as he shook the last of Muffet’s spiders out of his scarf.

“suck it up, pipsqueak. ‘s not my fault yer such a crybaby.”

“ONE OF THEM CRAWLED INTO MY EYE-SOCKET!”

“and?”

“ **AND?!**  REALLY?! YOU’RE SO MEAN!”

“ooh, i’m so offended!” Sans cried mockingly, placing a hand against his forehead and one on his chest. “my baby brother just called me mean! what’s he gonna do next? is he gonna call me a poopy-head? a fart-face? my bones are rattlin’ with fear!”

Papyrus’ eye-sockets were brimming with crocodile tears. “SHUT UP!“ he wailed, stomping the ground. “SHUTUPSHUTUPSHUTUPSHUTUPSHUTUP!”

The older skeleton laughed harshly. “crybaby!” he sang.

“YOU’RE THE WORST, YOU HEAR ME?!  **THE! WORST!** ” Papyrus sobbed, turning heel and running for the bathroom. 

“where ya goin’, crybaby?” Sans teleported in front of him, blocking the doorway. Papyrus used blue magic to move him aside, kneeling down on the cold floor to get the bottle of “window cleaner” (which was actually just water and blue food dye) out from the sink cabinet. Sans’ smug grin turned to an irritated frown. “oi. stop bein’ a lil brat.”

“I HATE YOU! I DON’T WANT TO LIVE IN THIS WORLD ANYMORE!” Papyrus unscrewed the cap and started chugging. He hadn’t even drank half the water before the bottle was slapped out of his hands and he was lifted off the ground.

Sans was staring at him with wide eye-sockets and tiny eyelights. “spit it out. spit it out. spit it out.”

Papyrus narrowed his eye-sockets defiantly and swallowed. 

“no! fuck, nononononono!” Sans teleported the two of them to the kitchen and started filling a cup with water. Papyrus sagged against the wall, his eyelids drooping. His brother thrust the glass in his face. “drink it!” When he made no move to take the glass, Sans forced his jaw open and poured the water into his mouth. 

“UGH…”

Sans’ expression only got more panicked when Papyrus groaned. “shitshitshitwhatdoido?!” He tossed the glass onto the counter and took his phone out of his pocket. He frantically dialed a number and put his phone on speaker mode.

_“✋☞ ✡⚐🕆 ☟✌✞☜ 💧⚐💣☜❄☟✋☠☝ ❄⚐ 💧✌✡📪 👍✌☹☹ 💣☜ ✌☝✌✋☠ ❄⚐💣⚐☼☼⚐🕈. ✋ ✌💣 ✌ ✞☜☼✡ 👌🕆💧✡ 💣✌☠ ✌☠👎 ✋ ☟✌✞☜ ☠⚐ ❄✋💣☜ ☞⚐☼ 🏱☼✌☠😐 👍✌☹☹💧.”_

“fuck, of course! dad’s not takin’ any calls today! ugh, why do i always gotta fuck everythin’ up! ‘s all my fuckin’ fault!”

“SNRK—!”

“i’m such a fuckin’ idiot!”

“PFFFTT— BAHAHAH! APRIL FOOLS!”

“…what?”

“I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU ACTUALLY FELL FOR THAT!” he cackled. “YOU’RE SO FUCKING  _STUPID!_  STARS, YOU SHOULD’VE SEEN YOUR FACE!”

“you… god, i thought i…”

“NYAH HAH HAH! ANOTHER VICTORY FOR THE GREAT PAPYRUS!”

“…well played, bro.” Sans exhaled raggedly, wringing his shaking hands. “well played.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Papyrus is saying bad words already... *sigh*


	7. April Fools Special #6: The War

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> @anneimaginesundertale/@annegirl13 donates a bowl filled with a mixture of M&Ms, Reese’s cups, and skittles to the skeletons (and a certain Agent of Chaos) in The Multiverse Room.

The doorbell rang amidst the chaos in the multiverse room. “WHO’S GETTING IT?” Papyrus shouted from behind the upside down couch.

“not me!” Red yelled back, reloading his slime gun. “baby blue can go get it!”

“NOT ME!” Blue said quickly. “BOSS SHOULD GO!”

“I’M NOT TAKING ANY CHANCES,” Boss hissed. “BLACK. GO GET IT.”

“WHY ME?!”

“Alright, fine!” Snowflake said. “I’ll get it. Shoot me and I’ll snap your neck.” She quickly sprinted to the door and opened it. A bowl of candy was on the doorstep. She picked it up. There was a note on the bowl telling her who it was from. “It’s from Anne!” 

“check it for traps!” Rus called, narrowly dodging a glob of slime.

Snow inspected the bowl. There definitely weren’t any traps in there, but… “It’s clean!”

“I DON’T TRUST YOUR VERDICT!” Black snarled. “YOU’RE PROBABLY IN ON THE PRANK! CAN SOMEONE TRUSTWORTHY CHECK IT INSTEAD, PLEASE?!”

“You’re one to talk.”

“SHUT UP!”

“i’ll check it,” Sans offered from his prison of Flex Tape.

“NO! NOT YOU!”

Red raised his hand.

“AND NOT YOU EITHER!”

“INCOMPETENT, ALL OF YOU! I’LL CHECK IT!” Boss marched over to Snow and snatched the bowl from her. He stared at it for a few seconds. He glanced back at her. The eye contact lasted only a moment before he announced, “ALL CLEAR!”

“what did anne get us?” Orange asked.

“Candy.”

“well, isn’t that  **sweet**  of her?” he chuckled, scooping a handful out of the bowl and tossing it into his mouth. 

One uneventful second passed. 

Suddenly, Orange spat all the candy out onto the carpet.

“BROTHER!”

“EW!”

“what happened?”

“dude, that’s fuckin’ nasty!”

“I’M NOT CLEANING THAT SHIT UP!”

“uh…”

“HAH!”

Orange slapped the bowl out of Boss’ hands. Candy spilled everywhere. “illegal,” he choked. “that shit’s illegal!”

“LANGUAGE!”

“what’s illegal? what’s in there?”

“look!” Orange picked up an M&M, a skittle, and a chunk of Reese’s Cups. “anne mixed em all together!”

“SCANDALOUS!” Papyrus gasped.

“i’ll give you 100g if you eat one of those,” Rus whispered to Red, gesturing at the spit-covered candies on the floor.

“you two!” Orange pointed at Boss and Snow. “you guys almost let me eat that abomination!”

“THAT’S WHAT YOU GET FOR DRAWING DICKS ALL OVER MY MIRROR!”

“those were perfect portraits of you!”

“NO, THOSE WERE DI— OH, YOU LITTLE—! I’M GOING TO GRATE YOU ALIVE!” Boss tackled Orange to the floor. Blue sprung to his feet, but Snow quickly shot him down with her slime gun. He stumbled backwards, accidentally stepping on a tripwire and activating a trap. He ducked under the barrage of water balloons that came flying at him, which ended up colliding with an unsuspecting Black.

“WHAT THE FUCK?!” he screamed. He whirled around and jabbed an accusing finger at Papyrus. “YOU WANNA GO, PANSY?!”

“I-IT WASN’T ME!”

“BULLSHIT!”

The war raged on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I might've gotten a little carried away with this.
> 
> Anne's writing is amazing! Go check her out on Tumblr at https://anneimaginesundertale.tumblr.com!


	8. April Fools Special #7: The Not-So-Sweet Surprise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (🍭) The reader pranks US Papyrus with candy that’s supposed to be sweet, but is actually very sour. (Prompt sent by @queen-lethargy)

“of all the days these could’ve arrived,” Papyrus grumbled, unwrapping his box of custom lollipops, “they just had to arrive today, huh?”

“Better hope the box isn’t empty.”

“you didn’t open this before, did you?”

 _Yep._  “Nope!”

“really?”

 _Nope._  “Yep!”

Papyrus stared at you for a little bit longer before turning back to the box and removing the tape sealing the top. He took a lollipop out and got to work unwrapping it.

“Eating one already?”

“y’know me, hun. my sweet tooth is insatiable,” he chuckled, summoning an ecto-tongue and popping it in his mouth. 

Three seconds later, Papyrus vanished into thin air. You heard the tap in the kitchen turn on followed by loud spitting and gargling. You entered the kitchen to find the skeleton hunched over the sink, frantically washing his teeth. “What’s the matter, Papy?” you asked sweetly.

“what the hell was that?!” he managed to choke out. “that’s gotta be the most sour thing i’ve ever tasted, god…!”

“Lemon flavored ultra sour Toxic Waste,” you said, holding up the candy wrapper with a cold smirk. “Don’t worry, darling. Your beloved honey champagne lollipops are safe with me.”

“you’re evil, you know that?”

“Know it and own it, baby.”


	9. April Fools Special #8: The Unprankable(…?)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (🥛) The reader offers UF Sans a glass of “water” that’s actually filled with vinegar. (Prompt sent by an anonymous follower)

“Hey hun!” You sauntered over to the couch and sat right down on one of the many places he’d planted his whoopee cushions.  _Pbbttt!_ You sighed.

“gotcha,” Sans said with a smug grin. His plan was to lounge around on the couch for as much of the day as possible. He’d been setting up traps since last month. All he had to do now was kick back and watch the show. 

It seemed, however, that you had something else in store for him. “I got you some water!” you said, your tone bright and sunny.

If you were trying to lull him into a sense of security with your cheeriness, you’ve never failed harder at something in your entire life. He cautiously took the glass you were holding out, subtly analyzing it. 

 _nothing stuck on the glass. is there anything in the water? nope. maybe there’s salt or sugar dissolved in there? is this even water? vinegar, maybe? alcohol?_ Sans smirked internally.  _not like it matters, anyway. bottoms up._

“thanks darlin’.” And with that, he emptied the entire glass into his open mouth, letting the liquid fall right through his skull and soak into his shirt. He looked over at you. “so, enlighten me here; what was  _really_  in that glass?”

Your eyebrows furrowed slightly, but you recovered quickly. “Water, of course.”

“doll.”

“…Damnit. Fine. It was vinegar.”

“heh.” Sans leaned back against the armrest, folding his arms behind his head. “c’mon, sweetheart. i know you can do better than that. gimme somethin’ ta actually worry about! don’t make this too easy fer me now!”

“Trust me, bone boy. It won’t be.” You stood up and walked off, hand raised in a wave. “Have fun dealing with the itching powder.”  

“…itching powder?”


	10. April Fools Special #9: The Soap-rise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (🍥) US Sans pranks Papyrus with a bar of soap that looks like chocolate. (Prompt sent by @pureangleda)

Papyrus slammed the door shut behind him right before Sans reached his room. He pounded on the door. “LET ME IN, PAPYRUS!”

“never!”

“DON’T MAKE ME GET THE AXE!”

“we have an axe?!”

“NO, BUT I CAN PROBABLY FIND A GOOD TUTORIAL ON HOW TO MAKE ONE!”

Papyrus sighed, sliding down the door with his back to it and coming to sit heavily on the carpet. Sans kept hammering on his door for a good ten more seconds before giving up and running off down the corridor, probably to set up some more traps. “that’s gonna be fun to deal with,” he muttered dryly, picking at the dried slime on his shirt. 

He crawled over to his bookshelf, and, using his desk as support, heaved himself to his feet. He reached up top, slid a hidden cabinet space open, and took out a small safe and a bottle of honey. He punched in his complex password (4-2-0) and opened it eagerly. Inside was his secret stash; a handful of candies and a few bars of chocolate — the only safe things in this house today.

He unwrapped a bar of chocolate and, after covering it with honey, took a big bite.

…

THAT’S NOT CHOCOLATE.

Papyrus teleported to the bathroom and spat it out. He turned on the tap, failing to notice the near-invisible string that was tied to it. A coke and mentos bomb exploded right next to him, splattering him with soda. Some even got in his eye. He groaned, detaching his skull so he could wash it properly. 

“I SEE YOU FOUND THE SURPRISE I PLANNED FOR YOU!” Sans said, having suddenly appeared out of nowhere. “OR SHOULD I SAY” — he winked and pointed finger guns at Papyrus — “THE SOAP-RISE! MWEH HEH HEH!”

If Papyrus wasn’t drenched with Coca-Cola and had soap bubbles frothing from his mouth, he would’ve laughed too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> day 3 of exploiting us papyrus' sweet tooth


	11. April Fools Special #10: The Yeet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (🌺) US Sans accidentally gives the reader a bouquet of flowers they’re allergic to. (Prompt sent by @keziha-chan)

When it came to pranking Papyrus, Sans pulled no punches. However, seeing as this was your first April Fools Day with him, he’d go a little easier on you. Just a little. His plan was to start off with small, well-known pranks and slowly ease you into more difficult situations. 

Currently hidden behind his back was a bouquet of white Queen Anne’s Lace flowers. He’d planted a water squirter in the center of the bundle. This prank was nothing compared to what else he had planned for today. He giggled in anticipation as he bounded up to you. “OH, DEAREST!” he sang.

“Yes?” you said, turning around with a smile. Your casual expression dropped when you saw the bouquet in his hands. “Are those—”

“FLOWERS!” He thrusted them eagerly in your direction. “FOR YOU!”

You backed away from him. “Sans, what type of flowers are those?”

“QUEEN ANNE’S LACE! PRETTY NAME, ISN’T IT?”

“I’m allergic to those!”

“…HUH?”

“Phytophotodermatitis! Plus I have pollen allergies! Why do you think I hate spring so much?!” 

“OH.” Realization and guilt slowly settled in his soul. “SHOOT.”

You sneezed. Sans yelped, flung open the nearest window, and chucked the bouquet out, accidentally throwing it right into a stranger’s face.


	12. April Fools Special #11: The Accident

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (🚪) The reader pranks UF Sans by covering the doorway with plastic wrap. (Prompt sent by @keziha-chan)

“you can run, sweetheart, but you can’t hide!” Sans sang, chasing you around the backyard with a hose in hand. You stopped, wrenched the hose around so it was spraying water over him instead, and fled into the safety of the indoors. You ran into the kitchen, scrambling to find something that would help give you the upper hand. You opened a drawer. Inside were some cooking utensils, cling wrap, and aluminium foil.  _Cling wrap! Perfect!_

You grabbed the box of cling wrap and a roll of tape, quickly setting the trap up. Right after you’d taped down the sides of the cling wrap, Sans came running around the corner and straight into the plastic, ripping the cling wrap clean off the wall. You’d been aiming for the cling wrap to be at chest height, but in your haste, it ended up covering his face completely.

Sans stumbled, scrabbling at his face and hissing like a cat. You managed to record a few seconds of the spectacle on your phone before he crashed into you. “what the fuck did you do?!” 

“It’s just cling wrap, Sansy!”

Sans clawed at the cling wrap on his face, accidentally shredding it with his sharp phalanges. Small bits of plastic rained into his wide eye-sockets. “shit!”

“Let me help you.” You reached out. He smacked your hand away and hissed again. Slightly irritated, you took a firm hold of his head. “I’m being nice here! Stop moving and just let me—!”

Sans’ skull popped right off his neck.

“…”

“…”

You started screaming, which made Sans start screaming too. His body ran wildly about the room. “H-Hold still!” you cried, chasing after him. He tripped over a step stool and you rushed to catch him before he hit the ground, almost dropping his head while doing so. You quickly re-attached his skull, and Sans gave it a quick spin to check that it was properly fixed. The two of you breathed a heavy sigh of relief. 

The moment of peace, however, was over in a matter of seconds.

“Oh my god, I thought I killed you!”

“same! why the fuck did you do that?!”

“I didn’t know your head would pop off like you’re a Happy Meal figurine!”

“pap used to detach his skull all the time! he still does! he’s done that  _right in front of you_ before!”

“I didn’t mean to do it, okay?!”

“shit, i can still feel the pieces in there!”

“Hold on, I can—”

“no! i’ll do it myself!”

“But—”

“stay over there! don’t come any closer!”   


	13. April Fools Special #12: The Unexpected

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (🍬) The reader offers grapes wrapped in candy wrappers to UF Papyrus. (Prompt sent by Heartstamp Anon)

“Oh, Papy, darling!” you called happily.

Papyrus turned his head away from the TV, regarding you with a raised bonebrow. “YES?”

You held a handful of candy out to him, barely stifling your giggles. “I got you some candy!”

He reached out slowly and closed his fingers around the candy, yanking his hand back so quickly it seemed like he had been burned. He watched you suspiciously as he unwrapped the candy. You just tittered and grinned like a schoolgirl.

“GRAPES…?”

“April Fools! I got you good, huh?”

“THIS… THIS IS YOUR PRANK?” Papyrus bit off half the grape and inspected the center, most likely looking for anything you might’ve hidden inside the fruit. 

“Yeah!”

“I WAS EXPECTING FAR WORSE,” he mused. “I USED TO LIVE WITH SANS, AFTER ALL. HIS APRIL FOOLS PRANKS ALWAYS TOED THE LINE. THIS IS A REFRESHING CHANGE.” He popped the rest of the grape into his mouth and unwrapped another. 

You just smiled.

Poor Papyrus didn’t even notice the glitter bomb you’d rigged ticking over his head.


	14. April Fools Special #13: The Distraction

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (🍺) The reader pranks US Sans by pretending to drink vodka (it’s just water). (Prompt sent by Heartstamp Anon)

“DEAREST?”

“Yessssss?”

“I DON’T THINK CONSUMING SO MUCH ALCOHOL IS HEALTHY.”

“I’m fiiiiine,” you slurred, giggling madly. “It’s fine! Don’t worry ‘bout it!”

“I  _AM_  WORRYING ABOUT IT,” he said, taking the bottle of “vodka” away from you. “LOOK AT ALL THESE EMPTY BOTTLES! YOU’VE ALREADY DRANK THREE!”

“I have?”

“YOU HAVE!”

You giggled some more, draping yourself over Sans’ legs. You glanced at the clock behind him.  _Two more minutes,_  you told yourself.  _Papyrus should be ready by then._ Sans stroked your cheek and you leaned into his hand. The two of you were silent for a minute until he suddenly said, “THAT’S WEIRD.”

“Hmm?”

“YOUR SPEECH AND MOVEMENTS ARE IMPAIRED, BUT YOUR CHEEKS AREN’T FLUSHED. THE LAST TIME YOU WERE INEBRIATED, YOUR FACE WAS RED.” He studied the vodka bottle for a bit and, after summoning an ecto-tongue, tasted some of the liquid inside. He looked back down at you. “THIS ISN’T VODKA! IT’S WATER! HOW DID YOU GET DRUNK OFF WATER?!”

“I didn’t,” you said, sitting up straight.  

“BUT WHY WOULD YOU— THERE’S NO REASON TO— UNLESS…” You watched his expression slowly morph into one of horror as realization dawned on him. “MY ROOM…! PAPYRUS!” He jumped up from the couch and you lunged after him, locking your arms around his legs. 

“You’re not going anywhere!”

Sans tugged your arms off his legs and sprinted up the stairs. “YOU BETRAYED ME! YOU’RE DEAD TO ME!” 

You tackled him to the floor from behind, wrestling with him for power. Sans managed to push you off him, but by the time he’d staggered to his feet and turned towards his room…

It was too late.

“hey there, bro.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wonder what Paps did :3


	15. April Fools Special #14: The Not-So-Prepared

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (🍮) US Papyrus replaces Sans’ vanilla pudding with mayo. (Prompt sent by Heartstamp Anon)

Sans was at the police station. Just because it was April First doesn’t mean he could skip work! Plus, the Ebott Police Department was engaged in a fierce battle with the Ebott Fire Department, and they needed all the people they could get. 

They’d decided to take a break from making traps for lunch. Sans watched his friends take out their lunches. Everything in Alphys’ lunchbox had a pair of googly eyes stuck on them. Waldo’s sugar cookies were incredibly salty. One of Rajesh’s chicken drumsticks was literally encased in a block of ice. Henry found some fake bugs in his fish-ball noodle soup. Faith had fake bugs in her lunch as wel— Nope. Nevermind. Those were real bugs.

 _NONE OF THAT WILL HAPPEN TO ME,_  he thought triumphantly. He’d cooked his lunch at 2 AM in the morning (after checking that Papyrus was asleep and couldn’t interfere) and stored it in a secret secret secret spot until it was time to go to work. He took out his Tupperware container and a smaller, circular container filled with homemade vanilla pudding. After finishing off his barbacoa taco, he enthusiastically peeled the tub of pudding open and put a large spoonful of it into his mouth. The taste of mayo hit his tongue, and he immediately spat it out into the nearest rubbish bin.

“You okay?” Henry asked. “Did you get plastic bugs too?”

“NO,” Sans said, “BUT MY BROTHER SOMEHOW FOUND A WAY TO REPLACE MY VANILLA PUDDING WITH MAYONNAISE.” 

He’d put it in his secret secret secret spot! How did Papyrus find it?! 

Did he know about his secret spot? Did he know about his secret secret spot too? He’d have to come up with a secret secret secret secret spot after this was all over. For now…

“ALPHYS?”

“Yeah?”

“I’LL BE RIGHT BACK. THERE’S SOMETHING I NEED TO TAKE CARE OF.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Random background characters with not-so-randomly chosen names...
> 
> And yes, skeletons with the Papyrus personality think in all caps as well.


	16. April Fools Special #15: The Math Lesson

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (🦄) 8-year-old SF Sans tries to convince 4-year-old Papyrus that there’s a new number between 5 and 6. (Prompt sent by @hansama/@han-doodles)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Papyrus is 4 years old and Sans is 8 in this fic. Gaster does not run horrifying experiments on his children here but he’s still a shitty dad.

“FIVE PLUS THREE.”

“eight! harder!”

“TWO PLUS TEN.”

“twelve!”

“NINE PLUS FOUR.”

“fourte— no, thirteen!”

“NINETEEN PLUS TWO.”

“twenty one!”

“…ZIN PLUS FOUR.”

“zin?”

“OH, DID I FORGET TO TELL YOU ABOUT NUMBER ZIN? DAD TOLD ME ABOUT IT YESTERDAY. IT’S THE NEW NUMBER BETWEEN FIVE AND SIX.”

“no it isn’t!”

“YES IT IS.”

“why did he tell you and not me?!”

“MAYBE BECAUSE HE FINALLY REALIZED HOW MUCH OF AN IDIOT YOU ARE? JUST A THOUGHT.”

“i’m not an idiot! you’re an idiot!”

“EXCUSE ME?!”

“you’re excused!”

“WHAT THE— WHERE DID YOU LEARN THAT?!”

“none a’ your beeswax!”

“FINE! I GUESS YOU’RE OKAY WITH MAKING A FOOL OF YOURSELF AT SCHOOL, THEN!”

“i won’t, because zin isn’t real!”

“YES IT IS! YOU’RE JUST TOO STUPID TO ACCEPT IT!”

“no i’m not!”

“YES YOU ARE!”

“no i’m not!”

“YES YOU ARE!”

“❄☼✌ ☹✌ ☹✌📬 ✋ 👌☜☹✋☜✞☜ ✋ ✌💧😐☜👎 ☞⚐☼ ✈🕆✋☜❄📬”

“DA— ER, FATHER! I WAS JUST—”

“dad, dad! sans says there’s a new number between five and six called ‘zin’! is that true?!”

“📬📬📬✡☜💧📬”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Han posts amazing stuff over at her art account (https://han-doodles.tumblr.com). Go check it out!


	17. April Fools Special #16: The Completely Normal Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> UT Sans and the reader prank Papyrus by sticking all the furniture in the house onto the ceiling. (Prompt sent by @queen-lethargy)

Papyrus pulled up in Sans and his human’s driveway. You had sent him a text (which came across as more of a conscription, really) last night asking for reinforcements against Sans. Normally it was Sans and Papyrus teaming up to prank their friends, but Papyrus found excitement in the prospect of overthrowing the self-proclaimed master of pranks. 

He parked his car, marched up to the door, unlocked it, and opened it as discreetly as possible. He peeked inside.

Paint and slime was splattered all over the walls. All the furniture had been upturned and there was smoke wafting from the kitchen. You were ducked behind the table, war paint smeared on your cheeks. Bodies of unknown but important-looking people were everywhere. Sans was lying in a fort of ketchup bottles, fast asleep as his goons fired mercilessly upon your hiding spot. 

At least; that was what he expected to see. 

What he saw instead was… nothing.

The living room was completely empty.

…

Why could he hear a National Geographic documentary playing?

Papyrus tilted his head upwards. Every single piece of furniture had been stuck to the ceiling. You and Sans were sitting on the couch, cuddling and watching TV like nothing was out of the ordinary. 

“oh. hey bro.” Sans waved at Papyrus. “come over here and take a seat.”

Papyrus hesitated for a bit. He placed his foot on the wall to his right and, after his body had “locked” onto the new plane, shifted his gravity so he could walk up the wall and join the two of you on the ceiling. “ISN’T THIS BAD FOR YOUR HUMAN’S HEALTH? Y’KNOW… BLOOD CIRCULATION AND ALL THAT?”

“We’re just watching TV, Paps. What’s wrong with that?”

“HOW LONG HAVE YOU TWO BEEN UPSIDE DOWN FOR?”

“we’ve been sitting here ever since the documentary started.” Papyrus picked up the remote (which had been stuck to the coffee table via Blu Tack) and briefly paused the documentary to check the timestamp. If what Sans said was true, you two had been upside down for forty three minutes. That couldn’t be right. You would probably have passed out at this point, and holding you up for so long with blue magic would surely have taken a toll on Sans’ energy. 

“YOU GUYS ARE AWARE OF WHAT DAY IT IS TODAY, YES?”

“Today is another ordinary Monday.”

“YOU CALL THIS” — he swept his arm around the room — “ORDINARY?” 

“yep.”

“Why wouldn’t it be ordinary?”

“WE COULD START WITH THE FACT THAT YOU’RE BOTH SITTING ON A COUCH THAT’S BEEN BOLTED TO THE CEILING.”

“are we?”

Papyrus sighed and shook his head. “I’M GOING TO GO SEE HOW FAR YOU WEIRDOS TOOK THIS.” He went down the corridor and opened the door to you and Sans’ bedroom. Everything in there was on the ceiling as well. Even that annoying dog from the underground was up there, wagging its tail and yipping at him. He squinted at the sight. “AM I HIGH?”


	18. April Fools Special #17: The Overthinker

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> UF Sans and the reader tell Papyrus to prepare himself for pranks that never come, leaving him on edge for the whole day. (Prompt sent by @quezq)

“hope yer ready for april fools, boss,” Sans had sniggered on Thursday.

“We’ve got something special in store for you,” you’d said when you passed him in the corridor on Friday, a suspicious box of items in your arms.

“it’s gonna put every prank i’ve ever pulled to shame,” Sans had crowed during dinner on Saturday.

“You’d better prepare yourself,” you’d warned him with a smirk on Sunday.

Papyrus watched the hands of his bedside clock tick past 12 o’clock. Monday had officially come. He barely slept at all that night. If his brother and his human’s plan was as elaborate as they’d made it sound, they’d have planned for every single one of his actions, no matter how insignificant it may seem. He couldn’t take any chances. 

Finally, at 6:44 AM, he got out of bed and started his day. He went through his daily routine warily, flinching at every movement he thought he’d seen in the corner of his eye. After carefully making his way downstairs, he realized that he was alone in the house. He called Sans’ number just to make sure.

“whaddya want?” 

“ARE YOU TWO AT HOME RIGHT NOW?”

“Yeah. Look behind you.”

Papyrus summoned five bones and whirled around. Nothing was there.

“Hah. Got you.”

“WHY ARE YOU WHISPERING?”

“shhh. quiet.”

“WHA—”

A loud clang was heard from Sans’ end. “shit. gotta go.”

“Don’t worry about what we’re doing, big boss. What you  _should_  worry about is the glitter bomb we put in your room.” 

“cover me!”

“On it!”

You hung up. Papyrus hurried upstairs and into his room. Nothing looked out of the ordinary, which just made him even more anxious. 

After two hours of second-guessing and triple-guessing his own judgement, Papyrus had finally finished going through everything in his room and getting rid of anything that looked dodgy. Triumphant, he called Sans and boasted, “NYAH HAH HAH! CONSIDER YOUR PLANS THOROUGHLY FOILED! I’VE PURGED ALL YOUR BELOVED GADGETS FROM MY ROOM!”

“Swell timing, Papyrus.”

“what took you so long? the trap we set in the backyard should be going off soon.”

“THE BACKYARD?!”

“Yeah. Good luck with that.”

Papyrus jumped out the window and rolled across the grass. What was that shovel doing there? Was anything hidden in those bushes? That bird looked awfully suspicious! 

An hour of investigation proved that the backyard was clear of traps. Skeptical, he called Sans once more. “ARE YOU DORY? DO YOU HAVE SHORT TERM MEMORY LOSS? THERE’S NOTHING OUT HERE!”

“Where have you been looking?”

“EVERYWHERE!”

“Everywhere but under the dirt, I’m guessing?”

“ **WHAT.** ”

“we buried it!” Sans cackled.

“WHERE DID YOU—” Sans hung up. “FUCK! SHIT! UGH!” Papyrus let out a stream of curses, furiously stomping the ground. The bird he’d seen earlier chirped. He sent a bone flying in its direction and screeched, “WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT?! FUCK OFF!”

By the time he’d thoroughly scarred that bird for life and ruined the backyard with his relentless digging, the sun was starting to set. Covered in dirt and fed up with everything in his life, he called Sans again. “I’VE CLEARED THE BACKYARD. IT WAS CHILD’S PLAY TO SOMEONE AS GREAT AND TERRIBLE AS I.”

“congrats.”

“IS THIS ALL YOU TWO HAD PLANNED FOR TODAY? HAH! PATHETIC!”

“The house.”

“HUH?”

“yep. the tsar bomba of all pranks is the house itself.”

“THE ENTIRE HOUSE?!”

“mmhmm.”

“Unless you can dismantle our trap before 11:59 PM, we’ll make your last minute of April Fools Day hell.”

“have fun!”

Papyrus almost broke the door down on his way back into the house. 

When 11:58 PM came around, Papyrus was sprawled out on the couch, surrounded by broken furniture. He watched the hands of the clock on the wall tick past 11:59. He tensed, preparing himself for the worst.

Nothing happened.

It was 12 o’clock before he knew it. He jumped up and down on the couch, fist pumping and cheering wildly. He called Sans and shouted, “I DISMANTLED YOUR STUPID TRAP! I DISMANTLED  _ALL_  YOUR STUPID TRAPS! YOU GUYS WERE TOO EASY! HAH!”

“ _you’re_  too easy!”

“April fools!”

“there weren’t any fuckin’ traps to dismantle in the first place!”

“I bet you trashed the house trying to take our non-existent traps apart.”

“i bet your grip on the phone is so tight right now, you can hear it cracking.”

“I also bet you want to find us and kill us. Slowly.”

“which is why we’re in a hotel right now…”

“…And also why we’re gonna hang up before you do your creepy seeing-through-the-phone thing to track us down.”

“bye!”

Papyrus’ scream of rage woke everyone in the neighborhood up.


	19. April Fools Special #18: The Lie

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (❗️) The reader blows sneezing powder in UT Sans’ face. (Prompt sent by @this-is-rae)

“well, well, well,” Sans chuckled, looking up at you. “fancy seein’ you  **hanging**  around here.”

You scowled at him, shifting uncomfortably inside the net you were caught in. “What do you want?” It was bad enough that he’d succeeded in covering you with oobleck and sprinkles. You were completely at his mercy now. 

“that’s a little rude.”

You batted your eye-lashes at him, smiling sweetly. “What do you want?”

“i want you to surrender.”

Your sweet smile was wiped off your face in an instant. “No way!”

“i don’t think you really have a choice here, kid.” He leaned against the wall with a smug grin. “c’mon. just say that you surrender to sans, the master of pranks, and i’ll free you.”

“‘That you surrender to Sans, the master of pranks.’ There. Now free me.”

“nope. say it properly.” 

You shifted again, picking at the net and wondering if it would break if you tore at it enough with your teeth. You sighed when you realized it wouldn’t. As you were mourning your soon-to-be-lost pride, your arm bumped against something in your pocket. Sneezing powder! There was hope after all! Hiding your crossed fingers, you said, “I surrender to Sans, the master of pranks.”

“now that wasn’t so hard, was it? wait here. imma go get a knife.” Sans disappeared from the hallway. You quickly uncapped the tiny bottle of sneezing powder, emptied it into your hand, and shoved the bottle back into your pocket. Sans reappeared right as you curled your hand into a fist to keep the powder trapped within. He cut the net and helped you out. 

You took a step back and blew the sneezing powder right in his face, wiping any residue off on your pants. “Take that!”

Sans quickly wiped his face with his sleeve, but it was too late. The powder had already taken effect. “what did you— ah—  ah— _chu!_ ” What sounded exactly like a kitten’s sneeze left Sans’ body. His bones rattled with the force of the sneeze. He sniffed, rubbing his nasal aperture. 

“Was that you? You sneeze like a kitten!”

“literally everyone who’s ever heard me sneeze says tha—  _chu!_ ” 

You gasped, hands flying up to your chest. “Oh my god! So cute!”  

“glad to hear that you find my suffering —  _chu!_  — my suffering cute.  _chu!_ ”

You keeled over. “My heart! It can’t take all this cuteness!”

“if —  _chu!_ — if playing dirty is how you wanna do this, i’ll play —  _chu!_  — along. i’m gonna —  _chu!_ — make you pay.”

“Sorry, I can’t hear your threats under all those adorable kitten sneezes!”

“ugh…  _chu!_ ”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This special was inspired by this adorable post (https://www.deviantart.com/zarla/art/what-was-that-o-644432234) by @zarla-s (check out her other kitten-sneezing Sans comics while you’re at it).
> 
> I love the headcanon that Sans sneezes like a kitten. It’s super cute.


	20. April Fools Special #19: The Framed Mutt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (⁉️) The reader pours itching powder on SF Papyrus’ hands and down Sans’ shirt. (Prompt sent by @awkward-ark)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (The title of this fic is a play on the title of an episode in Tom and Jerry)

You tumbled through the kitchen window with the grace of a fish out of water, almost knocking over a pile of pots and pans. You checked the time. 11:55 PM. You had five minutes left to prank your friends. Sans and Papyrus  _had_  to be asleep by now, right?

A peek into the living room proved that the answer was no, but they were pretty close to falling unconscious. Papyrus was sitting with his back against an upturned table, his head lolling drowsily. Sans was hidden in his fort of pillows, his eyelids drooping. You leaned against the wall, watching the clock on your phone anxiously. Come on, come on…

Papyrus was snoring in the next minute. Sans stayed stubbornly awake for three minutes and eleven seconds before you were sure that he was asleep. You crawled silently out into the living room, uncapped the bottle of itching powder you’d kept in your pocket, and emptied half of it onto Papyrus’ hands. You crept over to Sans and poured the rest down the back of his shirt. Papyrus stirred behind you, grunting softly. Adrenaline racing through your veins, you retreated back into the kitchen where you could watch the consequences of your prank in safety.

You stayed completely hidden behind the wall, just in case someone woke up and saw you poking your head out in the doorway. You could hear the scraping sounds of bone-on-bone contact. Just as you were about to check on what was happening, you heard a booming “ **PAPYRUUUUUUUSSSSSS!** ” that gave you a mini heart attack.

“bro, what—”

“DON’T YOU ‘BRO’ ME! YOU DID THIS, DIDN’T YOU?!”

“did what?”

“YOU POURED ITCHING POWDER DOWN MY SHIRT!”

“i didn’t do that! someone put itching powder on me too!”

“HOW STUPID DO YOU THINK I AM?! IF THE ITCHING POWDER’S ON  _YOUR_  HANDS, IT’S OBVIOUS THAT YOU DID IT!”

“how is it obvious?! why would i put itching powder on myself if i was the one who did it?!”

“YOU FUMBLED WITH THE BOTTLE AND ACCIDENTALLY SPILLED IT ON YOURSELF, OF COURSE! IT MAKES SENSE, SEEING AS YOU’RE NOTHING BUT A STUPID MUTT!”

“y’know, i thought you said you’d be prepared for everything… i guess you weren’t.”

“ **WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?** ”

“i said i wasn’t the one who did it.”

“BULLSHIT! I KNOW WHAT YOU SAID! THIS MEANS WAR, PAPYRUS! YOU HEAR ME?! WAR!”

“h-hey now, let’s just calm down—”

“FUCK, IT ITCHES! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!” The air crackled with powerful magic. You sunk down until your bottom hit the floor, bracing yourself.

“wait, wait! m’lord, please don’t—” A powerful beam of magic blasted through the wall just inches above your head. You turned around and looked up, staring wide-eyed at the crumbling hole before you. 

“LOOK AT WHAT YOU’VE DONE! YOU MADE ME RUIN A PERFECTLY GOOD WALL!”

“i—! alright, i’m sorry! please stop destroying our house!”

You fled the chaos through the window. Sans’ screams and the sounds of Gaster Blasters firing could still be heard from your house on the other side of the neighborhood.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sans has been through one too many pranks that day. This was his breaking point.


	21. April Fools Special #20: The Creepy-Crawly

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (🕷) The reader leaves a live centipede in US Sans’ bed. (Prompt sent by an anonymous follower)

“A PLASTIC CATERPILLAR?” Sans gestured with both index fingers at the centipede on his bed. “REALLY?”

“That’s a centipede.”

“YOU’RE PLOTTING SOMETHING, AREN’T YOU? THIS CAN’T BE ALL YOU HAD PLANNED TODAY.”

You shrugged.

“HAS MY BROTHER’S LAZINESS INFECTED YOU OR SOMETHING?”

You shrugged again.

He sighed, his expression one of faint disappointment before it suddenly turned to bright excitement. “NO MATTER! THIS IS A GREAT OPPORTUNITY TO FULLY PREPARE YOU FOR FUTURE APRIL FOOLS DAYS WITH MY VAST KNOWLEDGE OF PRANKS! MWEH HEH HEH!” He plucked the centipede off his bed and walked past you, presumably to dispose of it, when he suddenly screamed and dropped it. 

You smiled. “That right there is a Scutigera coleoptrata. It has fifteen pairs of legs.”

“EW, IT’S ALL CRAWLY!”

“I mean… that’s the only way they can get around.”

“CAN IT CLIMB WALLS?!”

“According to Wikipedia, it can run across floors, walls, and ceilings at a speed of zero point four meters per second. If you don’t want it hanging over you while you sleep, I suggest you pick it up and put it outside now.”

Sans inched slowly towards the centipede, his face pinched comically with trepidation.

The centipede crawled forwards.

He screamed again and ran to you, hugging you tightly. You chuckled, petting his skull as you watched the centipede begin its journey up the wall towards the ceiling. Once he noticed this, he broke away from you and yelled, “HEY! GET DOWN FROM THERE!”

“It’s harmless, you know.”

“BUT IT’S GROSS!”

“Isn’t there at least one other insect-like monster you’ve seen besides Muffet? Okay, well, spiders aren’t insects, but you know what I mean.”

“LEXI ONLY HAS FOUR PAIRS OF LEGS, AND SHE LOOKS WAY LESS CREEPY THAN—!” He stopped suddenly when he realized that the centipede had crawled out of sight. “NOOOOO! WHERE IS IT?!” He scrambled around the room, lifting furniture up and tossing things carelessly to the side in search of the centipede. “I CAN’T SLEEP EASY KNOWING THAT THING IS IN MY ROOM!”

“Sans?”

“WHAT?!”

“You might want to check what’s on your back.”


	22. April Fools Special #21: The Oracle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (🔮) The UT skelebros pretend to read the reader’s palm and give them a bad future. (Prompt sent by @this-is-rae)

After extensively consulting various websites on how to properly protect yourself against April Fools pranks, you had come up with a list of foolproof methods that would put all your worries to rest:

1\. Don’t believe anything anyone says to you.

2\. Don’t take any suggestions from anyone.

3\. Don’t leave the house.

With these three rules in mind, you flopped down on the couch and turned the TV on, more than ready for a day of lazing around. Not even a second later, the doorbell rang. You groaned, heaving yourself up and trudging over to the door. You looked through the peep-hole. No-one was there. 

“Oldest trick in the book,” you mumbled to yourself. When you turned around, however, you bumped into a tall figure dressed in a black cloak. You yelped, instinctively pulling your right fist back to punch the intruder. The stranger caught your fist with a gloved hand. It was only then that you realized Sans was in your house too. He waved at you. “Sans? Wait, are you Papyr—”

“I AM THE ORACLE! I HAVE COME TO TELL YOU YOUR FORTUNE!”

Yeah, that was definitely Papyrus. You should’ve taken Sans’ shortcuts into consideration when you planned for today. Might as well play along and see where this goes. “And how will you do that, o great oracle?”

“BY READING THE LINES ON YOUR PALM!” Papyrus opened your right hand and started tut-tutting over whatever he saw.

“What’s wrong?”

“THIS” — he traced your heart line with his index finger — “MEANS THAT YOU WILL DIE OF A HEART ATTACK!”

You gasped. “How horrible!”

“AND THIS” — he traced your head line — “MEANS THAT YOUR FUTURE PET WILL TRY TO EAT YOU!”

“Such despair!”

“THIS ONE” — he traced your life line — “MEANS… OH NO! YOU WILL GO BANKRUPT AT THE AGE OF FORTY FOUR! MAKE SURE YOU FINANCE WELL, HUMAN!”

“I most certainly will!”

“THIS—! OH, IT’S SIMPLY TOO HEARTBREAKING! APPRENTICE!” He clapped twice. “TELL THIS POOR HUMAN WHAT HARDSHIPS AWAIT THEM IN THEIR FUTURE!”

Sans came over to take a look at your palm. “yeesh. looks like you’ll die sad and alone if you don’t give us all your credit card information.”

“Not happening,” you said, shaking your head with a smirk. “How many people have you pranked today, Papyrus?”

“ACTUALLY, YOU WERE THE FIRST ONE TODAY! HOLD ON A SECOND!” He threw his cloak off. “HOW DID YOU KNOW?! SANS! WE MUST LEAVE! ABORT MISSION!”

“abort mission?”

“ABORT MISSION!” Sans grabbed Papyrus’ arm and they vanished into thin air. Watching through the window, you saw Papyrus scoop Sans up and start sprinting down the street. You could still hear their voices. “WHO’S HOUSE ARE WE GOING TO NOW?”

“undyne and alphys are next.”

“WAIT, BUT THEIR HOUSE IS—”

“in the opposite direction? yep.”

Dorks.


	23. Bonus April Fools Special: The Errands

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sans and the reader’s POV during Special #17.

Both you and Sans had agreed that waking up and infiltrating Frisk’s backyard at 6 AM was a good idea — That is, until the two of you remembered that you needed them to be up and about for the plan to work. About an hour later of whispered prank calls held behind Frisk’s house, Sans received a call from Papyrus. He took the call and put it on speaker. “whaddya want?” 

“ARE YOU TWO AT HOME RIGHT NOW?” Even though Sans had set his phone’s volume on the lowest setting, Papyrus’ voice was still too loud for comfort.

“Yeah. Look behind you.” You heard a rustle of fabric and a crackle from Papyrus’ end. Sans nudged you with a proud grin. “Hah. Got you.”

“WHY ARE YOU WHISPERING?”

“shhh. quiet.”

“WHA—” 

A loud clang came from Frisk’s room. They were awake. “shit,” Sans hissed, thrusting his phone into your hands and picking up his Airsoft gun. “gotta go.”

“Don’t worry about what we’re doing, big boss,” you said, holding the phone with one hand and checking your gun with the other. “What you  _should_  worry about is the glitter bomb we put in your room.” 

“cover me!” 

“On it!” You hung up and followed close behind Sans as he dashed across the backyard. He grabbed your wrist and teleported the two of you into the house. “Are you sure the BB bullets won’t hurt you?” you asked quietly. “You only have one HP, after all…”

“sweetheart, you wound me. have you  _seen_  how thick my jacket is? ‘sides, if push comes to shove, i can just use you as a shield.”

“…What?”

Sans chuckled, kissing your cheek. “kidding, kidding.”

“You better be.”

 

* * *

The next call came when you and Sans were playing cards in Undyne and Alphys’ house. The two of you had been in there for about thirty minutes, waiting for them to return home.

“wanna play blackjack?”

“Sure. I’ll be the dealer.”

Just as you began dealing the cards, you heard the front door open. Sans did too. He swept up the cards and shoved them in his pocket. You hurried into the closet and Sans closed the door behind you. His eyelights were the only source of light in the dark closet. He batted something out of his face, grumbling. 

“Are you sure it’s okay to be in here? This is technically breaking and entering.”

“relax, doll. we didn’t break anything. plus, undyne used to break into our house all the time when we were underground.” Sans suddenly paused. He pulled his phone out. Papyrus was calling him.

“Let’s make it quick.” Sans nodded, taking the call. “Swell timing, Papyrus.”

“what took you so long? the trap we set in the backyard should be going off soon.”

“THE BACKYARD?!” Loud. Way too loud. You could hear footsteps nearing your hiding place.

“Yeah. Good luck with that.” You hung up and, right as the closet door started sliding open, Sans whisked the two of you away into the living room.

 

* * *

You have no idea how you got into this situation, but for some reason, all the dogs that used to be in The Royal Guard were after you and Sans. “Sans, I let you out of my sight for  **ten minutes** and  _this_  is what you do?!”

“no regrets,” the skeleton snickered with a shit-eating grin. “i don’t think grillbz is ever gonna let me step foot in there again if it’s april fools day. anyway, paps is callin’ us again. wanna take it?”

“Let’s.”

 _Click._  “ARE YOU DORY? DO YOU HAVE SHORT TERM MEMORY LOSS? THERE’S NOTHING OUT HERE!”

“Where have you been looking?”

“EVERYWHERE!”

“Everywhere but under the dirt, I’m guessing?” you said, thinking quickly.

“ **WHAT.** ”

“we buried it!” he cackled, high-fiving you. 

“WHERE DID YOU—” Sans hung up. 

“Aww, why did you hang up? I had more stuff I wanted to say…”

Sans pointed forwards. You turned your head to look in his direction. Doggo, Lesser Dog, Greater Dog, Dogamy, and Dogaressa stood several feet in front of you, covered head to toe in whipped cream and marshmallows. They growled. 

“Oh.”

 

* * *

Sans stood guard at your side, listening to Papyrus boast about his “accomplishments” over the phone as you duct-taped a harmonica to the grill of your friend’s car. 

“I’VE CLEARED THE BACKYARD. IT WAS CHILD’S PLAY TO SOMEONE AS GREAT AND TERRIBLE AS I.”

“congrats.”

“IS THIS ALL YOU TWO HAD PLANNED FOR TODAY? HAH! PATHETIC!”

You beckoned Sans to give you the phone. “The house.”

“HUH?”

Sans smirked. “yep. the tsar bomba of all pranks is the house itself.”

“THE ENTIRE HOUSE?!”

“mmhmm.”

“Unless you can dismantle our trap before 11:59 PM, we’ll make your last minute of April Fools Day hell.”

“have fun!” 

_Click._

“nice one.”

“Thanks.”

 

* * *

Exhausted, you flopped down on the hotel bed. When 12 o’clock rolled around, you threw a fist in the air and whooped tiredly. Sans snuggled into your side, already nodding off. His phone suddenly went off, startling him out of his half-sleep. You took the call for him. “I DISMANTLED YOUR STUPID TRAP!” Papyrus shouted, his voice full of glee. “I DISMANTLED  _ALL_  YOUR STUPID TRAPS! YOU GUYS WERE TOO EASY! HAH!”

“ _you’re_  too easy!” 

“April fools!”

“there weren’t any fuckin’ traps to dismantle in the first place!”

“I bet you trashed the house trying to take our non-existent traps apart.”

“i bet your grip on the phone is so tight right now, you can hear it cracking.” You could even hear it cracking from your side of the call. 

“I also bet you want to find us and kill us. Slowly.”

“which is why we’re in a hotel right now…”

“…And also why we’re gonna hang up before you do your creepy seeing-through-the-phone thing to track us down.”

“bye!”  _Click._  “heheheh… we’re so fucked.”

**Author's Note:**

> Find me and my other works on Tumblr at https://snowflakeimagines.tumblr.com!


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